Jared’s plan not to think about Jensen fails miserably. He spends Sunday afternoon shopping for dorm supplies with his mom—if he’s forced to attend UTCW, he’s not living at home—further fanning the anger he’s been tending since the night before. Monday, Jared spaces out in Calculus, missing an entire concept while he obsesses over Jensen’s next move.

He expects to meet green eyes somewhere along the crowded sidewalk between the pizza joint and the computer store on Tuesday night, constantly checks the Impala’s rearview for Jensen’s jet-black sedan, but never catches so much as a flash.

Five days after their altercation in the club, Jensen finally makes a move. What he does changes the board entirely.

Jared walks into his house on Thursday night, tired from after-school meetings and a Calculus study group session (that he clearly needed), and finds his parents sitting at the dining room table. Not unusual, but the silence is too convenient, and Jared can’t smell dinner. His mom is staring across the table as if she’s barely holding herself back from running over.

“Hey,” Jared says, “did I forget a special occasion or something?” His dad studies the hardwood between his feet; his mom’s hands are trembling. “Did someone call the house? Because seriously, I’m fine—it was probably a mistake.”

“No one called us,” his dad says. “But, Jared, you should have told us.”

Jared’s coming up blank. “You mean about my English paper? It was a rough week, but we get to drop—”

“About your friendship with Jensen Ackles.”

“Jensen Ackles?” He hesitates. “I guess you could say I know him. Where’d you hear about that?”

“He was here.”

“What?” Jared’s thrown into motion. He drops his bag and rushes up to the table. “Are you okay? Did he—”

“We’re fine,” his dad assures. “He just wanted to talk to us.”

“Talking”—Jared huffs—“that sounds like Jensen.” Taking his usual seat by the window, he asks, “So what did he tell you?”

His dad draws his elbows up, sets them on the table. The illusion is all there, as if this is an ordinary family meeting. Not one concerning meddling vampires and the young men who compel them (for some reason).

“He told us you were becoming friends.”

Jared shrugs. “Not really.”

“Jared,” his mom speaks up, “he seemed…nice. Different than we expected. Why didn’t you tell us about him?”

“Maybe because he’s a vampire,” Jared mutters. “He’s been around for a few months, it’s not a big deal.” He tells the lie but knows he’s kidding himself. “What I don’t get is why he came to see you guys. He would’ve known I wasn’t here.” His parents don’t need to know that Jensen’s familiar with his schedule, but they’re too preoccupied to pick up on it.

“Well, he wanted to talk about you, your plans for the fall. Things like that.”

“He knows what I’m doing. What else?”

“Bear in mind that we only talked, Jared,” his dad says. “Nothing was settled on. We needed to discuss it with you first.”

His mom takes over. “Jensen came to us with a very interesting proposal, and since you’re set on moving out in the fall, you should hear him out.”

Jared works his jaw, he’s having a hard time getting the right sounds to come out of his mouth. “He…he came here to buy me?” he sputters. “How could you stand to listen to him? Protection is a bunch of crap! You’ve always told me how unfair the deals are.”

“He’s not asking for much in return.”

“I can’t believe this,” Jared fumes. “So what is he asking for?”

By now, Jared’s parents look extremely discomfited, shifting eyes and fidgeting fingers. The question hangs until Jared’s mom says, “Jensen told us those details were between the two of you. Jared,” she probes, “if there’s something you want to tell us about Jensen…”

“Yeah, to remind you that he’s a vampire! And not just any vampire, he’s the Founder’s son! I mean, what”—some of the spite drains out of him—“what does he want with me? I’m no one.”

Concern fills his mom’s eyes as she reaches for Jared’s hand across the table. “You’ll be living on campus in the fall. We want you to be safe.”

“By trusting a vampire like Jensen? I barely know him, and besides, you’ve never accepted anyone’s Protection before. Why are you considering it now?”

“It’s not for us,” his dad says, “but it could help you, Jared. We realize you’ve had a rough time growing up here, and maybe part of that is our fault for never accepting a deal.”

“So you think being sold out to a vampire is going to make my life better?”

“You’re eighteen, Jared. We can’t make this decision for you. If you don’t want to take Jensen up on his offer, don’t. But you should talk to him first.”

Jared wants to fire back, tell his parents they have no idea what they’re asking, but instead he gives them the impression he’s thinking seriously. His dad’s expression has gone flat while his mom can’t fix on one emotion, mollified and terrified in turns. As for what he should be feeling, Jared can’t settle either. Still angry with Jensen’s manipulations, he wants to be as disgusted as he’s pretending to be. But considering the times when Jensen does exactly what Jared asks, maybe the power can be balanced between them. There’s no precedent he’s aware of for a deal built on equal terms…he and Jensen could be the exceptions.

“I need to find Jensen,” he says, surprising everyone. Once it’s out, he realizes it’s true; Jensen’s the only one with answers, and Jared needs to see him, not hear secondhand information. “I’m going out.”

His mom objects. “It’s getting late. Can’t this wait until tomorrow?”

“You want me under Jensen’s protection, but you won’t let me go talk to him?”

Not receiving a response, Jared leaves. The Impala’s still warm where he slides his palm across the hood. He has no idea where to find Jensen, but he has a feeling it won’t matter. Jensen’s demonstrated a sixth sense where Jared’s concerned; the vampire will find him.

It takes longer than he expects. With no specific destination in mind, Jared ends up in the high school parking lot letting the Impala idle while he’s stuck inside his thoughts. His iron’s red-hot imagining that Jensen meant to work him into this position from the beginning: play at friendship and decency until Jared trusted him, offer protection like it’s no big deal, and reassure Jared that nothing between them would change.

But something has changed. Jared feels it even though he can’t identify it. He can trace the shift back to Descent, though the last thing he wants to do is indulge himself by revisiting that night, the way his body rode herd over his common sense. He’d nearly caved…

A sedan pulls into the lot. At least in a car, Jensen can’t sneak up on him.

Jensen parks alongside the Impala. Jared steps out and meets him around by the hood. “Who tattled on me this time?”

“No one,” Jensen says, “I was watching your house.”

“I don’t know whether admitting that makes you more or less of a stalker.”

Jensen slouches against the car, looking tired. Looking human. “I knew what I told your parents would upset you.”

The asphalt bears the brunt of Jared’s emotion as he scatters black crumbles with his feet, in no hurry to break the silence. He knows that Jensen’s watching him closely, not sure what his body language reveals. Strangely, he doesn’t mind being out here, exposed, in the dark with this vampire, knowing Jensen would protect him. But that doesn’t mean Jensen has his best interests in mind.

“Don’t you want protection?” Jensen asks. The jacket he’s wearing is tight across his shoulders. Jared wonders how the cold leather would feel if he reached over, but now is hardly the time for pleasant distractions.

“Isn’t life hard enough?” he adds.

Jared thinks for a moment before saying, “I’d rather live somewhere I don’t need it.”

“There are advantages. You wouldn’t have to worry about money,” Jensen argues, “and you could have any job you wanted when you graduate.”

Jared scoffs and sends a chunk of asphalt skipping across the lot. “If you know me so well, you know I don’t care about that stuff.”

“What about safety?” Jensen proposes. “You’d never feel threatened.”

“Offering safety on one hand while requiring bodily harm on the other is, like, totally hypocritical,” Jared’s quick to point out. “And every single deal I know about is based on it. Like, ‘here, I’ll keep others away from your blood, but you’ve got to let me take it instead.’”

If Jensen’s alarmed by Jared’s bluntness, it hardly shows. His expression is granite, eyes placid pools of green.

“That type of arrangement suits most people. Many…enjoy the benefits.”

“Keep the willing ones, then.” Jared pushes away from the Impala. “Let the rest of us go.”

“Jared—” The vampire takes one step, but pulls up at Jared’s rigid posture. “I actually thought you’d be interested in my proposal.”

That’s when Jared realizes he hasn’t heard it yet. He’s afraid to ask, scared that the answer might cement Jensen’s betrayal, but more worried he’ll want to agree with the terms Jensen outlines. Either way, Jared won’t win this round.

“Do you proposition everybody like this?” he redirects.

“You’ll be the first,” Jensen says.

“First one you’ve made this kind of effort for?”

Jensen shakes his head. “My first time as a Patron.”

Jared’s at a loss. How could Jensen not have protection arrangements with anyone? Granted, he doesn’t need them; Jensen’s skilled at getting what he wants, evidenced by the stable of fangbangers he’d kept before. Although, when Jared thinks back, he hasn’t seen Jensen with anyone since the town council meeting. He’s either hidden his sanguinary activities or gone cold turkey.

“Oh,” is all Jared can say.

“Tell me something, Jared.” Jensen crosses his arms. “Did you what Lyssa told you that night?”

“I’m not really sure.” Honesty is the best policy, right? “It’s not like I have a lot to go on.”

“Go with your instincts.”

“Now I’m really not sure,” Jared admits. “I’m all over the place lately. Seems to me like Lyssa knows you pretty well.”

“Less than she likes to think.”

“I don’t want to believe you’d con me like that, or that I was gullible enough to fall for the act.”

“I’m a terrible actor.”

Jared grins, ruining Jensen’s poker face. “Yeah, somehow I doubt that,” he says. If he’s somehow earned the real Jensen, then the vampire is putting on quite a show for the rest of Richardson. Human and otherwise. “Besides, if you’re only in this for a challenge, you’re wasting your time. I’m not much of a payoff.”

He loses Jensen to a middle-distance stare, eyes soft and expression unrevealing. There are no rocks left to kick so Jared scuffs his shoes on the asphalt, the scritch and crumble loud in the otherwise silent evening.

Finally, Jensen says, “You’re not a simply a challenge for me, Jared. Not to say that parts of our…relationship haven’t proven challenging.” He pauses, possibly to soak in Jared’s smile. “And you’re certainly not a trophy that I’m trying to win.”

“So what am I then?”

“I’m really not sure,” Jensen kindly mocks Jared with his own words, “but I know that you’re worth it.”

“God,” Jared huffs, eyes tracing shapes between the stars. The pictures he comes up with are odd, messy, without a way to connect the sparkling dots. “I have no idea what I’m supposed to do right now. This…this is crazier than anything I could’ve come up with. I thought, if any vampire ever offered me a deal, I’d throw it right back in their face. Probably punch them, too.” He looks at Jensen and the picture becomes clearer. “I thought I was going to hate you—I did hate you—but that was before I met you. The real you, not the vampire I found in there,” he adds, gesturing back to the high school where he’d seen Jensen with the red-haired woman. “Now things are way more messed up.”

“Maybe you should let me explain what I want from you.”

“I don’t know if I want to hear it,” Jared confesses, sandbagging the wall in his mind against the anger beginning to crest. If there were no deals, no Patrons and no protection, he and Jensen could talk like two regular guys feeling the stirrings of attraction. Jared doesn’t doubt it’s there, but with their cultures forming an imposing hurdle between them, true motivations—true feelings—become obscured. He can’t know what Jensen’s sincerely thinking because Richardson only provides one model for a relationship between a human and a vampire.

And it’s not the one Jared wants.

“You’ve gotta let me think, Jensen,” Jared appeals. “I need some time. But not, like, time alone.” Jensen meets his stare, doesn’t break away as Jared moves to sit beside him again on the Impala’s hood. “Could we maybe make plans to meet up next week?”

“No more surprises?” Jensen asks.

“You could show up first and I could surprise you,” Jared offers, nudging Jensen’s shoulder. He waits for his stomach to freeze up at the contact, but he feels strangely loose. “We can see how that goes.”

Jensen agrees and after working through a handful of scheduling conflicts—school and family responsibilities for Jared, classified fang-business for Jensen—they agree on Tuesday night.

“You won’t mind watching me eat?” Jared asks once they decide on dinner, location to be determined.

Jensen says nothing, but he winks and slips sideways off the Impala. The moon has risen, painting Jensen’s pale complexion starlight-blue.

“Let me know where you want to go,” Jensen says, standing beside his souped-up sedan. “I’ll see you on Tuesday.”

Jensen drives away, out of sight but not out of mind, and definitely not gone; Jared’s positive he’s circling the school, no doubt waiting to tail the Impala back to Jared’s house. Knowing that, Jared remains in the empty lot longer than he should, picking the brightest stars out of the black canvas and tossing a wish to each one.

He figures it can’t hurt.

~~~

On Friday, Chad asks Jared, “what’s your problem?” no less than a dozen times. Katie’s not talking to Chad—not talking to anyone really, Jared notes—so the full force of his personality is aimed at Jared. And when Jared’s mind is too far afield to respond quickly, too occupied to laugh at jokes he’s heard before, Chad pouts before popping Jared with his elbow or kicking him in the shins. By the end of the day, Jared’s a mottled mess of developing bruises, but he laughs and promises Chad a guys’ night.

Jared’s parents rope him into a full shift at the computer store on Saturday. Later, he keeps his promise to Chad; they go to bed sugar-drunk on soda and pop-tarts, half-blind after multiple rounds of Mario Karts.

Sunday is for sleeping in, Jared’s mom’s cinnamon-pecan pancakes and, after Chad finally wanders back to his place, homework. It’s been two days since Jared’s parking lot rendezvous with Jensen and he’s no closer to making a decision. If anything, he’s tied himself into a bigger knot, but he is eager to see Jensen again. He thinks about calling Jensen, but hesitates, unsure of the message he’d be sending.

And then on Monday, Katie doesn’t show up for school.

Chad mopes, but Jared is worried; Katie swans her free-wheeling reputation, but she’s never missed a day. Jared texts her several times, stares at a frustratingly blank screen until lunch when Chad hustles up to him outside the cafeteria, all wide-eyes and wild arms, jabbering too rapidly for Jared to discern a point. They’re alone in the hallway, noises and voices shut behind double doors, when Chad catches his breath and sledgehammers Jared’s reality.

“They’re saying the Cassidys are gone.”

Jared gasps. “What? Who’s saying that?”

Chad heard it from Declan who heard it from his brother, an officer in the Richardson P.D. A lot of ears to play telephone through, but they—people in this town who know—never mess around with this brand of information.

“Declan said his brother and a bunch of cops were called out to the house…” Chad draws a hollow breath. “By Katie.”

Jared shakes his head, clearing the debris. “So Katie’s okay?”

“I…” Chad has no idea what to do with his hands; they flick and fidget at his sides. “I don’t know. Declan only told me—I mean, he didn’t hear much.”

“Okay, we’ll just—” But Jared doesn’t know what comes next. The tremors start at his ankles, body draining strength into his core, and soon he’s shaking all over.

Afternoon classes are a blur. Jared trades worried looks with a dozen other students while the majority remain in the dark—it’s not like one missing student is going to make headlines. They’re all working off the same rumors, spinning themselves into circles. After their last class, Chad meets Jared by the Impala and they drive to the Crowne’s. Victor Grayson’s not there, which is hardly a surprise, but Chad’s boss-slash-Patron could have provided clues. Chad stays to work his shift and Jared considers hanging around, but a phone call from his dad changes his mind.

Tuesday night, Jared keeps his meeting with Jensen.

He’s not sure the vampire’s going to show now that everything’s gone pear-shaped—they haven’t spoken since Thursday night, but Jared had tried calling. Twice he was dumped into an automated voicemail. After that, he thumbed out a text, short and to the point: McPhee’s. 8 pm.

Jared gets there early. He’s expecting the dive to be busy—part of his plan to meet Jensen in public—but there’s a folk-rock duo taking the stage at nine and the place is stocked with pre-partiers. Jared pushes through to the bar, where one of the bartenders challenges him with a stare that says he’d better not try to order liquor, spying a familiar figure cut from leather and top-shelf denim.

Jensen hasn’t stood him up.

The bartender is pouring Jensen a fifteen dollar glass of scotch from a bottle rarely used at McPhee’s. She adds a soda and pushes it towards Jared.

“I wasn’t sure if you were coming. You never texted back.”

Jensen turns in his seat, face washed of all expression. “I told you last week that I’d go wherever you chose.”

“Didn’t know it’d be so busy here,” Jared says as he’s jostled forward by a surging crowd.

Jensen crooks his head and stands. Jared follows him around the bar to a staircase stacked with people jockeying for the best view of the stage. They shoulder past, wind up at another door leading to the balcony, no doubt a popular spot on warmer nights. Jared’s glad he wore a jacket as Jensen leads him outside.

A few days ago, being alone with Jensen wouldn’t make Jared’s nerves sweat. But things change.

The balcony’s empty, its plank floor vibrating from the acoustics of the opening act downstairs. Walking in Jensen’s footsteps, Jared approaches the railing, unimpressed with McPhee’s view of Richardson’s bland warehouse district. He waits for the vampire to say something, throw words at the wreckage of Jared’s normal life, but Jensen’s quiet as death. It’s on Jared’s shoulders then.

“Are you gonna tell me what happened?” he asks.

Jensen consults the darkness around him, reading shadows. “You already have the necessary information.”

“I don’t know shit,” Jared curses, rage strong enough that he could rip the railing away and joust with it. “I’ve got rumors and second-hand stories, and all of that’s useless, I’m sure you know.”

“There’s nothing I can tell you—”

“Dammit, Jensen! You can tell me why my parents are saying that the Cassidys are probably dead, and that it has everything to do with vampires!” His accusation echoes off concrete and metal, bounces back and hits Jensen with little effect. “Explain that.”

“I have nothing to do with that family,” Jensen begins, pausing when he catches the venom in Jared’s eyes. “Whatever business they had with my kind, I wasn’t involved.”

“Such bullshit.” The railing creaks under Jared’s grip. “You’re an Ackles—you’re connected to everything.”

“That’s your assumption.”

“You’ve never showed me any differently!” Jared has struck a blow, a twinge of hurt marring Jensen’s features. “Tell me the truth and I’ll listen to you,” he pleads, “I deserve to know.”

Jensen fights with himself, the shadows reaching out to pull him back into black. Jared’s prepared to offer a hand, help draw him out of it, but only if Jensen earns it.

“The Cassidys,” Jensen says, voice raked over hot coals, “thought they could act without consequences.”

Jared stares. “That sounds like something you had to rehearse. Who fed you that line?”

“No one, Jared.” Jensen’s eyes darken, pupils clawing out to obscure his irises. “You wanted the truth. This is…a translation of it.”

“This is exactly what I didn’t want,” Jared seethes. “You, acting like every other fang I’ve ever met.”

Jensen refrains from physically reacting to the pejorative Jared stabs him with. “You have an extremely low opinion of my kind.”

A laugh, dull and grated. “I’ve never known anything else. I’ve been punished my entire life for the crime of being born here.” He assaults Jensen with every repressed conviction, some hurled out while others stick like phlegm in his throat. “I can’t live the life I want—I can’t even fucking leave for college, Jensen! I’ve been threatened, controlled, treated like god damn property, yet here you are, upset because I have a ‘low opinion’ of vampires.”

“Jared—” But he smacks Jensen’s proffered hand away, needs to keep out of reach for his remaining sanity. “I’ve only tried to help you.”

“How?” Jared’s ready to beg, shame himself and plead for Jensen to shake him out of this nightmare. “You dangled friendship in front of my face, and I thought you could be different, but you’re not.”

“What do you want?”

Jared’s appalled that Jensen can be so calm; he’s carved ice, unmeltable even though this is Texas. “Answers,” he says. “Tell me why we’re prisoners here. What gives you the right to act like wardens?”

“We can’t have word of our existence spreading.”

Jared scoffs, humor diluted by misery. “Dracula? Lestat? Freaking Twilight! Everyone knows about vampires, Jensen.”

“Literary fantasy,” Jensen tells him. “Do you really believe I’m some undead, supernatural being? Is that what science and logic tells you?”

Baffled, Jared shrugs, a weak gesture in the wake of such a potent question. In all his years, he’d never asked himself what Jensen and his kind really were, just assumed they were one and the same as the vampires of fiction and lore.

Feeble, Jared asks, “Then what are you?”

Jensen hesitates. Jared prays for those green eyes to soften, keep the promise he’d made to Jared and let him in. Restore Jared’s faith in his own life. But the rational matter in his brain recognizes that the vampire in front of him is unlike the one he’d considered binding his survival to. Closed off, calculating, unfeeling. Regret swirls, nauseates, as Jared understands that this is Jensen’s true face; the rest a carefully scripted act. And Jared nearly fell for it. Jensen’s next words are nails in the coffin Jensen will never see.

“I’ve already given you too much.”

“Fine.” Jared hardens himself. He’d come to McPhee’s hoping for so much. Now he’s lost everything. Pressure builds between his eyes, grief and anger clawing and thrashing at one another to dominate. But fear, dragging desperation behind it, sneaks through in the chaos. “You really want to help me, Jensen?” he asks. “Then make me forget everything. Can you do that?” Jared advances. “Bite me, compel me, and put me in some fang coma-trace. Whatever— I don’t care.”

“You—” Jensen’s breathless. Wonders never cease. “You believe I have that kind of power?”

“You have to,” Jared implores. “How else could you turn Richardson into your own sick, vampire-Chuck E. Cheese? Everything’s a game and we’re the fucking buffet! But if you can make me forget all that, maybe my life’ll be worth something. Maybe you’ll let me leave just like the people who have no clue about you.” Rolling now, desperately falling all over his self-respect. “I won’t be a threat because I won’t remember anything! Please, Jensen…”

Jared used to daydream about what killing a vampire would feel like. No clue how to do it, of course, but if he ever managed, he’d imagine the unlucky bastard’s face would mirror Jensen’s right now. Utter shock, breath sucked in but never released, eyes dying more with every second. He’s just stabbed Jensen through the heart with a weapon he never knew he possessed.

Jensen gathers himself. “You would do that to your family?”

Jared refuses to think about that aspect. They match stares; Jared’s close to tears, exhausted and hung out to dry. The music seems so far away, tension dampening sound and sensation.

Jensen’s composure shatters. “No.” He shakes his head. “God no, Jared. I can’t. You’d hate me.”

Jared means to say that he already does, but one wound is all he’s capable of inflicting tonight.

“I tried to do things differently,” Jensen continues, low and contemplative. As if he’s speaking to himself. “I knew you wouldn’t—couldn’t accept me if…well, I suppose it doesn’t matter at this point.” Jared wants to scream out that it’s the only thing that matters. “I wish I could make you forget this conversation,” Jensen eventually says. “I don’t think it’s something you’ll want to remember. But I can’t, and I’m sorry.

“But I will find out what happened to Katie’s parents. I swear, Jared, I’ll tell you what I find, but I need time. Time alone,” he tacks on before Jared can ask. “We could both use that.”

Jared doesn’t know how to respond. Despite the pedestrian view beyond the balcony, Jared’s eyes are pulled back to it, double-checking shadows, something sinister in even the smallest movements.

“You’re right,” he says, turning around, “but I—”

The balcony’s empty, Jensen pulled back into the night’s embrace. Their time alone starts now.

~~~

Jared wanted his life to change. In certain ways, it does.

At home, his parents steer around any topic bordering on vampires or the Cassidys, and talking about Jensen Ackles is totally off-limits. Things are awkward for a few days, edges beginning to fray. A week after McPhee’s, Jared snaps when his mom and dad refuse to acknowledge everything that’s happened.

“Are you just gonna act like things are fine?” he detonates over chicken enchiladas. His mom jerks her hand away from her glass, knocks over the bowl of salsa. White placemats soak up the red. “As if Jensen never happened?”

“Jared,” his dad admonishes while his mom wastes a pile of napkins on the mess in front of her, “this isn’t appropriate right now.”

“Last week you were practically throwing me at a vampire! You told me that I’d be safer when I went to college.”

Jared’s mom chokes on a sob, and then says, “I think you need to consider staying at home for a few semesters. Until we know—”

“I know more about what’s going on in this town than either of you,” Jared’s hurries to point out, “but you refuse to listen.” He’s desperate for them to know, understand how twisted things have become. The knowledge is a heavy burden to carry, heavier than ignorance. But his parents don’t concede that night. Or the next. After that, Jared gives up and keeps his trials to himself.

Since his parents are as receptive as rocks, Jared turns to Chad, but his best friend’s sour mood is tougher to break than he’s expecting. Chad misses Katie—they both do—his distress manifesting emotionally and physically. Raccoon-eyed and depressed, Chad erupts in volatile bursts that fade quickly. At school, Chad’s vacant, running on auto-pilot

Thinking information might snap Chad out of his funk, Jared shares pieces of what Jensen told him at McPhee’s. He keeps the more intimate details out, deliberately vague about their relationship, but tells Chad that Katie’s family had somehow violated their protection. He doesn’t know how, but it was enough for the Sterlings—Alex or Lyssa or both—to move against them. Either way, or wherever they’ve gone, Katie’s parents are beyond human help.

But instead of reinforcing their friendship, the information puts a distance between Jared and Chad that hasn’t existed since the epic tree-house battle of fourth grade. He looks at Jared differently, avoids him at school, and Jared wracks his brain for an explanation for why his best friend’s not pissed off, ready to fight.

Knowing Chad’s schedule, Jared confronts him at Crowne’s after nearly a week of dodged glances and unreturned calls and texts. Chad’s response to Jared’s confusion is heartbreaking.

“Look, Jared,” Chad says, hovering over the table, “I tried, okay? I asked my parents about the contract thing. I even went to Victor,” he admits with a tremor. “My Patron made it very clear that I needed to keep my mouth shut and”—Chad sighs—“reexamine my priorities.” Jared hears the threat wrapped in pretty words. “Along with the people in my life.”

Jared looks up. “Chad…”

“I can’t,” Chad hisses. “I barely know what I’m supposed to do right now. I can’t be involved with you. Not while you’re so wrapped up in Jensen-fucking-Ackles. Fangs don’t act like that, Jared! They don’t just give out information for free. There’s always a price, you know that!”

“I still think Jensen’s different.”

“Maybe he’s setting you up. He wants to see how far you’ll run with all this before he stomps you out.”

“Jensen wouldn’t do that,” Jared says without enough conviction.

“How the hell would you know?”

“I just do, okay?”

“Whatever,” Chad blows him off. “Just stay outta here for a little while, okay? Let shit settle down.”

Jared knows better than to hope this goes away quickly, but he stops arguing with Chad, refusing to put him in danger, too.

At school, senior-fever is in full swing as their final semester winds down. Jared musters false enthusiasm, keeps his grades where they need to be despite his assignments feeling minor in the grand scheme of things. He goes to a few parties—thrown by students filling the void left by Katie’s absence—but skips the rest, spending more time alone than he has in years. Solitude doesn’t bring clarity, however. Only confusion.

True to his word, Jensen gives him time. Jared goes weeks without noticing the telltale tingle at the back of his neck; if Jensen is out there, he’s keeping a significant distance.

When he’s not going through the motions with his homework, or filing work orders at his parents’ store, Jared relives his time with Jensen. Combs over their encounters, awkward or arousing, for the smallest clue, but he ends up without a clear picture of what Jensen wants. A relationship, yes, but one based on protection, quid pro quo? One built around friendship, or more? There’s no handbook Jared can turn to, no support. His family, not to mention his best friend, is pressuring him to stay away from Jensen, but he’s just not sure.

Jensen Ackles possesses a wicked reputation, but he’s also the guy who gifted Jared with car washes for his birthday. Who broke down and refused to compel Jared even as he begged to forget the evil he’d grown up with. Jared trusts Jensen to some extent; can’t shake the parts of him that want to see Jensen, learn everything there is to know about him. About them.

Once a week, Jared is overwhelmed with the urge to contact Jensen. He surrenders more than a few times. The texts start casually: Could use some help with my German assignment, or I can’t believe I’m graduating in a few weeks o_O. They escalate after dark when fear and insecurity prey on Jared’s psyche.

I need to see you. What’s going on?

You ruined everything. I knew you’d disappear when you got what you wanted.

Jared regrets the desperate ones. In either case, Jensen never texts him back.

~~~

Two weeks after an underwhelming graduation celebration, Jared’s drums his fingers on the counter waiting for someone or something to save him from death by boredom while his dad fixes laptops in the back of the store.

Nothing’s changed in weeks; life in Richardson has suffered on, business as usual with the exception of whispers in the dark, louder now than ever before. Jared works full time as summer slowly marches him towards college. He should be excited—looking ahead to the next four years—but dread weighs him down.

The electronic chime on the door wakes him from his daze. He blinks once to clear the bored haze from his eyes, then again to make sure he’s actually seeing what he thinks he’s seeing.

“Katie?”

Katie Cassidy looks around before approaching the counter. She smiles at Jared, but he feels no warmth from it.

“I went to your house first,” she says, “but your mom told me you were working.”

Jared laughs nervously, gesturing to the empty store. “Working…um, sure.” When seeing a long-absent friend, Jared would normally wrap them up in a bear-hug built to squeeze the loneliness out of both of them, but Katie’s aura is holding him away. Her blonde curls are held loosely behind her head with a neon green band, face free of any makeup. She looks tired, a little bit older than Jared remembers. If Jared had gone through what she has, it would show on his face, too.

“So, you were looking for me?”

One more time, Katie’s eyes make a sweep of the store. Jared recognizes the apprehension in her guarded expression. “Any way you could take a break right now?” she asks, and since Jared knows his dad won’t mind, he calls into the back that he’s heading out for a little while.

“Where are we heading?” Jared asks once they’re outside. He doesn’t know what else to say—he hasn’t seen Katie in months. He’d rehearsed a dozen speeches right after she disappeared, each one fading as rumors leaked out. Last Jared heard, Katie was staying with a human family (an oblivious one) and had somehow managed to graduate high school despite not showing up to classes once after her parents disappeared.

“The coffee shop up the street,” Katie says, leading the way. The walk is silent, but once they’ve settled at a café table towards the back of the shop, Katie begins explaining herself.

“I’ve heard a lot of crazy things since I went underground,” she tells Jared, ignoring the cup of black coffee the barista had poured for her. She’d glanced over every single customer when they arrived; Jared’s not sure if she was looking for someone specific or casing the shop.

“Like what?”

“Things about you meeting with some fang,” she says, keeping her voice low.

“Katie—”

“I didn’t really believe what I was hearing, you know? Because Jared Padalecki hates fangs. Everyone knows that.”

The anger radiating from Katie is new. Jared’s seen her be happy and sad, wild and flighty, charismatic and serious. But never angry. This isn’t a reunion between friends, it’s an interrogation.

“I still hate them, Katie,” Jared explains carefully, aware that they’re in public. “But Jensen and I have a history.” He’s not afraid to use Jensen’s name; there’s only one vampire Jared could be connected to. “It’s com—”

“Don’t tell me it’s complicated,” Katie hisses. “After everything that’s happened to me, you think I don’t understand how all this works ? I never thought you, of all people, would tie yourself to a fang. And for what, Jared? What the hell are you getting from him?”

“Nothing,” he admits, barely a whisper. “And I’m not tied to him. He’s not my Patron.” Jared bares his wrists on top of the table. “I don’t wear anyone’s seal.”

She looks, grabs his arms and turns them over as if she can’t believe the lack of a bracelet, the official symbol of protection in Richardson. She deflates. “I don’t understand…”

“With Jensen…it really is complicated.” Jared’s lips twist into an ugly smile. “I think he wants to be my friend, but that’s not really how it all started.”

Their coffees remain untouched as Jared shares most of his history with Jensen. Unlike with Chad, he tells her almost everything, from Jensen helping him with his homework during more than one lazy afternoon, to Jensen’s proposal to Jared’s parents. Katie listens, face blank, until Jared tells her about their showdown with Lyssa Sterling at Descent.

“That bitch,” Katie curses. “She was in my house the night…” Katie shudders, takes a moment to collect her emotions. Jared sees her fingernails digging slices out of the tabletop. “The night my mom and dad disappeared, I came home and Lyssa was there, waiting for me.”

“Why?” Jared asks without thinking. Any mention of Lyssa stirs his blood. “What did she say?”

“I—I can’t, Jared. I’m sorry.” She sounds sincerely regretful, and Jared decides not to press. “There’s so much I still don’t understand, so much I can’t figure out. I have no one left,” she says, voice brittle. “I waived protection, you know.”

Katie must have turned eighteen while in hiding. Her parents were obliged to Alex Sterling, and Katie would have had the option to enter into the same kind of contract as soon as she was legally an adult.

“Seriously?”

“Well, it was more like rejecting protection, I guess. I don’t want anything to do with them anymore—I don’t care if it puts me at risk.”

Jared sympathizes. Protection is made up of nothing but silk bonds. They feel pretty good until you realize you’re caught in a web with nowhere to go. Not to mention there’s something waiting to devour you.

But then Katie says, “Alex made me so many promises, you know? He was willing to make every dream I had come true. And he was charming,” she adds. “I didn’t mind having him around when my parents were…gone.” Jared reaches across the table, brushes the back of her hand with his fingers. It’s all he can do to support her. “He let me do whatever I wanted. We had…I guess I had fun when he was there.”

It sounds so familiar—Jared’s story told in different words. A charming vampire, an impressionable teenager eager for attention. Pretty words and promises that preceded darkness and shattered dreams. Jared’s vision whites out for a few seconds, rage and anger andhurt overcrowding his senses.

God, how could he have been so stupid?

This time, Katie touches him. “I’m sorry, Jared. I didn’t want to make you upset, I just…I need someone to help me. I need answers.” A pause, then, “I think you do, too.”

Words spoken in earnest, bolstered by the kind of determination Jared used to feel before Jensen scrambled his wants and intentions. Here’s someone who’s not telling Jared to back down and lay low, who instead means to join him. Katie has lost more than anyone Jared knows; she has every reason to fade away, disappear, but tragedy has left her empowered. Fed up with solitude, Jared sees Katie as a flame in the darkness he’s been living in.

And there, in an unremarkable coffee shop sitting across from someone Jared never expected to have much in common with, the path in front of him is finally laid out.



EPILOGUE.

“Seriously, Mom, I’m fine,” Jared insists as he hustles across campus, past the buzz of streetlights warming up. “You didn’t need to leave seven messages.” Saying that doesn’t stop her from fretting, but he’s slowly getting used to her persistent state of worry.

Jared tucks his cell phone against his cheek, keeping it in place with his shoulder while he tries to close his bag around what feels like twenty pounds of books. He’s just finished his first week of college courses—a dozen other firsts crammed into five days—but this is the last time he’s carrying all of his books to class.

It takes six minutes to walk from Gardner Hall to Jared’s dorm, and his mom rattles on for five-and-a-half. He hangs up with his building in sight; he can already picture Kevin, his engineering roommate from Arkansas, sprawled out somewhere on his half of their fifteen-by-fifteen dorm eating chicken wings and Cheetos. A few more steps and Jared will be safely inside, hopefully stealing whatever buffalo wings are left.

The chill hits him ten feet from the main door. Jared’s heart ices over; he hasn’t felt cold like this in months.

Jared checks the shadows. “Jensen?” Silence. Thirty seconds pass, but the frost within him fails to thaw. “I know you’re there, Jensen,” he says. “We can talk if that’s what you want.”

“Are you sure you can stomach the thought of talking to me?” Jensen’s voice creeps across the back of Jared’s neck. He turns, and the vampire is right there. “Lately, you’ve been quite vocal with your opinions of my kind.”

Even as his heart is pounding, his gut screaming for him to run, Jared squanders vital seconds acknowledging how good Jensen looks. He hasn’t changed much—still flawless—but there’s a sharpness to the finery that Jared fears to touch.

“I was always willing to talk to you,” Jared admits. “You’re the one who disappeared.” Jared recalls the sting of dozens of unanswered texts, the shame of desperate voicemails left in the deepest hours of the night. “You told me you’d come back.”

Jensen’s intense inspection of Jared’s body from nose to toes ignites him from the inside, out. He appreciates the warmth, a little awed by the admiration in Jensen’s gaze.

“Why’d you come here?” Jared presses. “I thought campus was out of bounds.”

“Planning on reporting me to the council?”

He’s not. It would hardly do any good.

After a moment of tense silence, Jensen adds, “I wanted you to know what happened to Nathan and Carmen Cassidy.”

Jared’s shocked. He and Katie have grown closer since graduation, united in their hole-and-corner mission to uncover useful knowledge about Richardson’s non-human population. After Jensen failed to reappear months ago, Jared gave up hope of finding out what happened to Katie’s parents.

“Tell me,” he insists, stepping closer. Jensen remains planted, but a spark catches in his eyes. “Jensen, please…”

The vampire sighs—so human—and says, “Not here.” He leads Jared away from the glass doors, around the side of the building where weak pools of yellow light allow Jared to see his face.

“What do you know?”

Jensen dodges Jared’s stare. “The Cassidys never violated their protection, but they were planning to. They were looking for a way out of their contract with Alex Sterling. And a way out of Richardson.”

“Why?”

Jensen shuffles, his manner uncomfortable. “Their daughter.”

It doesn’t connect right away. Jared processes the vampire’s expression: skin tight around his temples, pinched upper lip, green gaze boring through Jared, begging him to understand so he won’t be forced to explain.

And finally, he does.

“Oh my god.” Jared repeats it a few times, but the disgust doesn’t wear off. “Sterling—he wanted…”

Jensen nods. “Katie was still seventeen. Her parents refused his demand. They intended to smuggle her out of town, but they ran out of time. And Alex is used to getting what he wants.”

“Did—” Jared has trouble saying the words. Remembers the vacant look in Katie’s eyes when she’d walked into the computer store. “Did he? Get what he wanted?”

Jensen regards him with care. “No, but Alex didn’t take kindly to her parents’ interference.”

“And that was okay with you?”

“Jared—” Jensen reaches for him but Jared jerks away. The vampire checks the area to make sure they’re still alone. No need to worry—UTCW has a strict curfew (for good reason), and the grounds are deserted.

“I mean it!” Jared seethes. “How could you let this happen?”

“I didn’t know until—”

“Are Katie’s parents even alive?” No answer. Jared’s stomach rolls. “So you and your family let this fucking pervert do whatever he wants to the people in your town?”

“Alex will be dealt with.”

“Sorry if I don’t take your word on it. God, when Katie hears about this…”

Suddenly Jensen’s a whole lot closer. “You can’t tell her. I mean it. Katie cannot know.”

Jared spins away, fists clenched, helpless. “I have to do something! Her family is gone!”

Jensen is his shadows; he moves with Jared. “You can be there for Katie. Help her. Protect her, and protect yourself. Don’t go any further down this road, Jay. It’s too dangerous,” he quietly asserts, leaving no room for argument.

But Jared makes room. “Her parents disappeared—they’re probably dead! Katie’s not just gonna give up.”

“The truth won’t help her.” Or her parents, Jared hears. ”You need to let this go.”

Rage curdles and rises until Jared tastes bitterness at the back of his throat. He turns away again, needs to break their visual connection before his anger manifests physically. He’s tempted to take a swing, land a wild haymaker into Jensen’s side, but with Jared’s luck the blow would shatter his hand.

For five months he’s helped Katie dig up clues, make subtle inquiries. Their missions have dovetailed into a single quest to weaken the vampires’ influence in Richardson. They haven’t made much, if any progress, but Jared won’t give up. He’s lost too much, sees himself losing even more if Jensen takes this away from him.

“What am I supposed to do?”

Given the silence that follows, it’s possible Jensen has vanished—another mysterious encounter cut short without resolution. But the air remains charged, unnaturally still and heavy.

“You could accept my offer,” Jensen says from behind him. “You’ll need protection if you keep digging like this. I can help you.”

Jared looks back over his shoulder. “I don’t need help.”

Jensen holds his hands up. “Alright, Jay.”

That name again…Jared ignored it the first time. It tugs at him, warm and uncomfortable. Too familiar.

“I know I went about this the wrong way,” Jensen continues. “I never intended to put you in a situation like this. But accepting protection from me is the best way forward. Can’t you see that?”

“All I see is a vampire I’m not sure I can trust anymore,” Jared says, turning around. “I can’t take your deal, Jensen. Vampires have hurt too many people I care about, and I don’t see an end to that. Not while Richardson keeps working the same way.”

The wound is visible in Jensen’s eyes. “I thought you trusted me.”

“How can I?” Jared asks softly.

“I kept my word,” Jensen insists. “I told you about Katie’s parents.”

Jared concedes. “You did, but Katie and her family would never have been in danger if it weren’t for vampires. Do you even know how many people have died—how many have disappeared—because of you?” He almost regrets grouping Jensen in with the rest of his kind, but he can no longer afford to ignore the facts. “You should be protecting all of us from fangs like Alex! Not bargaining with our lives.”

“Is that what you want?” Jensen asks. “Protection without conditions?” He takes a step towards Jared. “Then it’s yours, you don’t need to give me anything in return.”

A violent sense of déjà vu passes through Jared. “Jensen, that’s not what I’m asking for. I need things to change. You and I—we can’t change anything on our own.” He sighs. “I won’t accept.”

Jensen sinks back into the shadows. Jared has the impression he’s been holding them at bay during the entire conversation, but is now resigned to the inevitable.

“If you need anything…”

Jared shakes his head. “I won’t.”

“Jared.”

“My answer is no,” Jared says, his words little more than an exhale. “You need to leave.”

The vibrancy fades from Jensen’s expression, replaced with the same apathy Jared’s come to abhor. Now he’s facing the Founder’s son, the cold soul. Jared had cradled a small sliver of hope that this meeting would end differently—though how, he’s unable to say—but it’s been reduced to dust.

Jared’s eyes turn up towards the sky; he tries to find one pinprick of light on an inky black canvas. He fails. Not even the stars are accepting wishes in Richardson tonight.

A warm, refreshing breeze touches Jared’s cheek and rouses him. When he looks down, Jensen Ackles is gone.

He tells himself it’s better this way; he’s stronger when he’s not face to face with Jensen. Even so, it’s as if a piece of him has been carved out and stolen, leaving only hollow desolation.

Jared stands motionless next to his building until he hears the front door creak open, hushed voices in the otherwise quiet evening. Peeking around the corner, Jared watches a guy he recognizes from his dorm hold the door open for a pretty brunette, exasperatedly waving her inside, probably for a Friday-night hook-up. Despite his mood, Jared grins at the subtle reminder that some people do get normal lives.

Just not him.

He takes one final look at the dark sky, catches a single star blinking far across the universe. He’s suddenly struck by the memory of his eighteenth birthday wish. Though Jared accepted it would never come true, he’d kept his wish a secret and never told anyone; if there was magic in the wish, he refused to break it.

The star flashes as if it’s begging Jared to try again, but he turns away. Despite the feelings that have wreaked havoc with his emotions ever since they met, he and Jensen can never be together. His wish—the man who'd appeared in so many of Jared's dreams—was powerless; it had dissolved as soon as he blew out his candles. Jared refuses to indulge in the same longing twice, because the odds could not be stacked higher against them.

It's time to move on.


FIN.